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Crush the “I HAVE TO” mindset

Updated: Aug 31, 2018

How many times do you feel like you "have to" do something that you don't feel like doing? Some people go to work every day and feel that way. Many stay at home moms feel that drudge of the daily tasks. If you ever have those days this post is for you!

Last week, our day was just about to come to an end and I had been working on a presentation for hours. It was a Friday and our family was hustling to tie up our week so that we can enter Shabbat at sundown. Typically the last hour of the day my 4 year old is done with working and he will bow out to go play. However, that day particular Friday, he came into the living room holding a large bag of laundry and with a smile on his face and he said, "Here you go. I don't have to! I get to!" I said, did your sister tell you to say that and he said, "no, I was just thinking about it." He then very dutifully came back and forth to deliver about four other bags and he stated the saying each time,

"I don't have to, I get to!"

You know this mama was pleased! A couple of weeks ago I shared a spiritual "download" with the family that I got when I was driving home from town one day. I shared that the Father was dealing with my heart and I realized that I was having a bad attitude about what He called me to do. I heard so clearly that day, "Are you a winner or whiner?"

My immediate response was I am a WINNER!

But, oh how quickly truth came in and I was sitting guilty of whining and complaining!

I was feeling like, OK fine Lord, if I have to, I will. During my drive I realized that the very thing He was calling me to do was because He equipped me to do it and that I had many gifts and talents to accomplish what He was asking of me. True, I would rather being do something else, but life is not about getting to do everything we want now.

Many times in life we have to live, now, like no one else so that later we will LIVE LARGE like no one else.

If you have to do grunt work, do it with all your being! The season will surely come when you will look back at the journey and see the character that was developed because you had a good attitude during the process.


5 Steps to Crush the "I HAVE TO" Mindset


1. Accept that although you may not be able to change your circumstances you can change your attitude.

2. Stop being a victim of your situation and be a victor!

3. Ask yourself is it really that bad? Do you know what the pioneers had to go through just to survive?

4. Be grateful for your abilities: to walk, talk, see & hands to work, whatever you can think of.

5. Repent of poor attitudes. If it happens again, hit repeat!

I did repent that day and I asked for forgiveness of the "I have to" mentality. By the end of the drive I was excited that I get to do what I was being called to do. I guess the message really hit home with my four year old because I didn't try to water down the message for his age. Instead, I gave it to him at an adult level and then he got it! Are you suffering from the "I have to" mindset? Now you know what to do!

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